I’ve never agreed with that old adage, even as a kid. I mean, not that I’ve ever actually been attacked by sticks or stones… I’m sure it can be extremely painful, but honestly, words hurt like hell.
Yesterday one of my girls slapped another girl across the face at recess. It took me all of this morning to piece together the following after questioning all the kids involved:
There are three girls in my class who are best friends. One of them has been trying for the past couple of weeks to “break up” the other two and keep one of them for herself, and she has managed to get them angry at each other. Those two, who have been BEST FRIENDS all year long, have called each other all kinds of nasty names over the past two days, including racial slurs. What the heck??! These are fifth graders. My own daughters don’t even know half of these terms, and even if they did they would never use them at school, and never in a million years against their own friend.
I had a talk with the girls today, the slapper and the slappee, about how they should never use derogatory terms like those to anybody, under any circumstance, and about how painful words can be. Not that I’m justifying the slap–physical violence should never be used either, but sheesh!! The words they used were pretty hard core. And what irritates me the most is knowing that those words are likely permanent fixtures of their environments, so they become just a part of their regular daily lexicon.
How can I compete against that?
squarepegteacher 
May 4th, 2012 at 4:52 AM
I used to teach in a similar situation. It was truly depressing, as when you met the parents of these children, the magnitude of what you were trying to change hit. Schools reflect the community, but they don’t have to reflect the worst of the community and instead should take the high ground and set the high standards. You have to be strong, lead by example and continue to foster the right attitude. In short, do exactly what you are doing. You might not notice the results even in the time you have those students, but your efforts and your example will always be in their minds somewhere, and sometime, maybe soon and maybe one day far in the future, your efforts will pay off. You may never know it, but keep it up. Sometimes it is easy to throw up our hands and concede defeat, and no one would blame you, but one person CAN make a difference, and wouldn’t it be great if it was you?
May 4th, 2012 at 5:39 AM
Thank you, Sarah. I know what you say is true. The number one reason I love my job isn’t the hours or time off but exactly what you said: just the chance to make a positive impact on these little minds, as cheesy as it sounds. When I taught in the inner city this kind of stuff (and worse!) was common, but I guess after teaching in the suburbs for so long I’ve forgotten how bad it can be.